Anu Malhotra – married over five years and blessed with a cute son who is four years old now. Yesterday night, there was a huge fight between the couples. She wants to enroll their son in British Curriculum, but her husband is opting for the national curriculum of India. They both are earning persons and have the solvency to get their son admitted there. But her husband can’t agree; he wants to bring up the child in his own culture. But Anu can’t get the point of not adopting the culture of being a student of the British Curriculum.
Both are right and logical in their perspectives. But the thing is that to decide who is more logical? But you can never get the result based on one side because none of them is wrong. At this point, a solution comes here: respect for both parties to one. You have to put your point of view by respecting the viewpoints. Any of you must sacrifice with your own decision, but not with logic. You can not make them illogical at some points. Just be polite, be respectful, and be decisive.
Contradiction: What is it, and Why does it Happen?
Two humans are universally different from one another. There will be many spaces between you for those distinguishable traits. Sometimes no logic can run; just personal choices can be delineated for this contradiction. I want to go to a movie, but another person says, I want to see my relatives. There is no logic, and it is Just the choice and the independence of our lives. Do compromise, someday you or someday another person. Both parties must make adjustments so that no one can feel insecure in their marital life.
It is very common to have logical incompatibility between two persons, even those brought up in the same family. So it is obvious in marital relations. It occurred when the hypothesis gathered from both parties outburn two different conclusions, which hit the logical reversal of each other. Contradiction is not a bad thing. It occurs in your own family, as said earlier. So take your life with all the situations with this trait. You will be a luckier one if there is very little happening of opposite ideas or choices in your spouse. But, adverse happening is expected.
Life is not a bed of roses. Living with a person brought up in another family, in another culture, in a different environment with disparate food habits and norms. It is a real challenge of life that nobody can disregard. If you find that both of you have to manage one another in divergent life matters, then, believe me, you have a sound relationship. Because you are trying to adjust, you are giving the chances to one another. This leads you to a long-term relationship.
How Can You Manage it?
If you think like that, this is completely illogical…absurd… uneven… approach your partner by showing these and hit the road with your perceptions. Attack your partner with rude words; make your spouse understand how spurious they are sound, believe me, you will lose. Lose a caring partner, a loving life companion; both of you lose. Moreover, it is not a contradiction. Rather the ways of managing it are left responsible for the hard relationship.
Communicate with Respect and Value
The considerable point here is the appreciation, not adherence. All the things we respect, don’t act upon them. As said earlier, never attack the opposite ideas. Take time, be honest, be patient and talk to your partner softly with love. Thus your partner would be able to get the points of your grounds too. Make sure that you both understand one another. Try to make yourself understand what grounds your spouse is using. Think of yourself in the place of your opposition.
Try to get the clauses behind this. Your partner may have come from a different family, a different environment, and different educational background. Just take along the differences as the support terms and try to convince your partner that you also have the grounds for having the idea of yourself.
Never Impose Anything on one Another
Forcing or imposing another to do particular tasks is not supported by a happy marital life. It’s not good for a healthy relationship. The more you force, the more the relation goes to ending position day by day. You can try to convince your points of perspective politely.
Never Take the Field at the Same Time
I saw them in childhood, and my father kept silent when my mom started arguing intensely. Because when both of the warriors are running their weapons blindly, nobody can be alive. Stay quiet; listen to your life partner, and choose another day to bring back your points. Till then, the outrage has reduced. You must follow this rule in the normal argument, too, because medically, there would be an imbalance in hormonal flow during that time, and the nervous system breaks down for a while. You can’t make yourself understand any talk distance from your belief. So till then, wait for hormonal balance.
Nobody is right, and nobody is wrong too. The main problem of contradiction is thought. You can’t say other ideas are wrong. So don’t spoil the time; make the point that who is right or wrong. Take the time that what can be why your partner is putting that points. What the positivity of this type of thinking could be maybe your concern. As has been noted, fighting is good for the health of your relationship. Wouldn’t be the life a boring if you have the same good flow of life? Lovelies here, where you want to understand your partner in every aspect. The traditional saying opposite attracts.
But all these are for a certain level, and if you find that things are not going right, perhaps your overall life has become heart-breaking all the time, then it’s wise to come out of it.