Anu Malhotra – married over five years blessed with a cute son who is four years old now. Yesterday night, there was a huge fight between the couples. She wants to enrol their son to British Curriculum, but her husband is opting for the national curriculum of India.
They both are earning persons, have the solvency to get their son admitted there. But her husband can’t agree, he wants to bring up the child in own culture. But Anu can’t get the point of not adopting the culture being a student of the British Curriculum.
Both are right and logical in their perspectives. But the thing is that to decide who is more logical? But you can never get the result biased in one side, because none of them is wrong. A solution comes here, in this point, respect for both parties to one another.
You have to put your point of view by respecting the viewpoints of another. Any of you must sacrifice with own decision, but not with logic. You can’t make him or her illogical at some points. Just be polite, be respectful, and be decisive.
Contradiction: What is it and Why it Does Happen?
Two humans are universally different from one another. There will be much spaces between you for those distinguishable traits. Sometimes no logic can run, just personal choices can be delineated for this contradiction.
“I want to go for a movie”, But another says “I want to go to see my relatives”. There is no logic. It is Just the choice, the independence of our lives. Do compromise, someday you or someday another. Adjustments must be made from both the parties so that no one can feel insecure in the conjugal life.
It’s very common to have the logical incompatibility between two persons even brought up in the same family. So it’s obvious in conjugal relation. It occurs when the hypothesis gathered from both parties, out burn two different conclusions which hit the logical reversal of each other.
”Contradiction” is not a bad thing. It occurs in your own family as said earlier. So take your life with all the situations with this trait. You will be luckier one if there is very little happening of opposite ideas or choices in your spouse. But the adverse happening is expected.
Life is not the bed of roses. Living with a person brought up in another family, in another culture, in a different environment with disparate food habits, and disparate norms are very tough. It is a real challenge of life which nobody can disregard.
If you find that both of you have to manage one another in divergent matters of life, then, believe me, you are having a sound relationship. Because you are trying to adjust, means you are giving the chances to one another. This leads you to a long term relationship.
How You Can Manage it?
If you think like that, this is completely illogical…absurd… uneven…and approach to your partner by showing these and hit the road with your perceptions, attack your partner with the rude words; make your spouse understand that how spurious he or she sounds, believe me, you will lose.
Lose a caring partner, a loving life companion; in fact, both of you lose. Moreover, it is not the contradiction rather the ways of managing it are left responsible for the hard relationship.
Communicate with Respect and Value
The considerable point here is the “appreciation”, not “adherence”. All the things we respect, don’t act upon it. As said earlier, never attack the opposite ideas. Take time, be honest, be patient and talk to your partner softly with love.
Thus your partner would be able to get the points of your grounds too. Make sure that you both understand one another. Try to make yourself understand what the grounds your spouse is using. Think yourself on the place of your opposition.
Try to get the clauses behind this. Your partner may have come from a different family, a different environment, and different educational backgrounds. Just take along the differences as the support terms and try to convince your partner that you have also the grounds that you have the idea of yourself.
Never Impose Anything to one Another
Forcing or imposing another to do particular tasks is not supported by a happy conjugal life. It’s not good for a healthy relationship. The more you force, the more the relation goes to ending position day by day. You can try to convince politely your points of perspectives.
Never Take the Field at the Same Time
I have been seeing from childhood, my father just kept silent when my mom started arguing intensely. Because when both of the warriors are running their weapons blindly, then nobody can be alive. Stay quiet, just listen to your life partner and choose another day to bring back your points.
Till then the outrage reduces. You must follow this rule in the normal argument too because medically there would be an imbalance in hormonal flow during that time and the nervous system breaks down for a while and you can’t make yourself understand any talk distance from your belief. So till then wait for hormonal balance.
Nobody is right, nobody is wrong too. The main problem of contradiction is that the thought. You can’t say other ideas to be wrong. So don’t spoil the time just making the point that who is right or wrong. Take the time that what can be the reason that your partner is putting that points. What the positivity of this type of thinking could be, that may be your concern.
As has been noted, fighting is good for the health of your relationship. Wouldn’t be the life a boring, if you have the same good flow of life? Lovelies here, where you want to understand your partner in every aspect. The traditional saying opposite attracts.
But all these are for a certain level, if you find that things are not going right, perhaps your overall life has become heart-breaking all the time; then it’s wise to come out of it.