Whenever a person falls for someone, that initial sense of connection is exhilarating and intense. This is even more prominent in long distance relationships, as there is a need to make up for the lack of physical intimacy.
Everything else takes a back seat, and there is a continuous urge to intellectually or emotionally sense the other person.There is a strong temptation to spend endless hours on texting and writing letters.
But this is where things go slippery, and couples get carried away.Communication is the cornerstone of long distance relationships.Therefore, it should be nurtured with maturity and paced nicely.
Reasons why balanced communication matters in Long Distance Relationships
Having a give-it-all attitude in the early stages of LDRs makes communication rather intense and rigid, and an element of casualness or humor goes missing. It becomes difficult to change this pattern in the later stages of a relationship, which invariably results in a break-up.
When people are in love, they divert their energies toward keeping their relationship stable and alive. In LDRs, this tendency is even more strong. That’s why the life outside of a relationship suffers more in LDRs, and when a person realizes this, it’s often too late to step back from the established communication pattern.
Even worse, a person loses touch with the other shades of human relationships, and the quality of conversations with family and friends flattens. In the long run, it’s not good for a person’s social health and may lead to a state of depression or isolation.
How to make Long Distance Relationship Work
So, if you are on the verge of a long-distance relationship, hold your horses and let it cook over a mild flame. Don’t indulge in daydreaming about your partner and devote some time towards building a healthier lifestyle, which includes maintaining your relationships with people around you.
See yourself through the eyes of different people. This way you can rediscover yourself and make your life more dynamic. Sooner or later, you will realize that one person cannot be the center of your universe.
The key here is to manage your time, energies, and priorities while communicating with your long-distance partner. Once you do that, the rest of the things will fall into place. Here are a few tips that might help you in this regard.
Focus on sustainability, when it comes to texting
If you think that texting your partner during office hours or ogling his/her Facebook wall during your spare time is sustainable, then you are clearly mistaken. Instead of being impulsive, you should dedicate time to your partner. This way you can have emotionally or intellectually enriching conversations with your partner.
If you feeling guilty of sacrificing your personal space, then convey it to your partner
LDRs can become tiresome after a certain while. The sense of individuality starts diminishing. Still, the communication is kept alive, either out of habit or fear of losing.
To make the situation more balanced, tell your partner that you really care for him/her but you need to find the other missing parts of your life. Plan out your interaction, say two or three days a week, at least for a month or so.
Do the same for your partner. If you feel insecure or fearful in doing so, then it’s a sign that you have lost touch with your individuality. So get back to things that had defined you earlier in life.
Spare some time for your friends, without giving it any second thoughts
Friendship is the greatest journey, the longest and the best. So instead of bombarding your partner with messages, make time for your friends, no matter what. They bring in perspectives that are often truthful and lead to introspection. They keep you grounded and away from self-delusion.
About the Author
Ashutosh Gupta is an Author, Life Coach, and Content Strategist. He started writing in his late teens, as the urge to pen down his abstract reflections began overwhelming him.